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Coma Chameleon (10-17-17)

You’ve been living a happy, successful life until one day when you wake up to discover you’ve been in a coma and it was all a dream. You awake to a life almost exactly the same as the life you had been living, apart from one crucial detail. [link to post]

My eyes fluttered open, and bright white light forced them closed. My body hurt. I felt stiff and severely uncomfortable. I knew this was not my bed. I opened my eyes slowly, one at a time. The room looked painfully bright, and I brought my hand up to shield my eyes. There was an I.V. line taped to my hand. I looked around and realized I was in a hospital room. I searched for the “Call Nurse” button and pressed it. Within seconds a nurse appeared at my door.

‘You’re awake!” she seemed pleased. “That’s great news, I’ll get your wife down here right away, and I’ll inform the doctor,” She said. She moved closer and worked on checking my vitals.

“Whaugh,” I blurted out. I tried to ask, “What happened?”, but my throat felt like sandpaper.

“Don’t talk, we’ll get you sorted soon. You’ll feel better once your wife gets here,” The nurse said. She finished checking me and made her way out the door.

My wife? Was I still married? My ex-wife was a vindictive bitch who accused me endlessly of cheating on her, even though I never did. My life was so much better once I got the restraining order. Divorce was not clear enough of a signal for her. Even the restraining order was not a clear enough signal for her, but at least I had the law on my side.

I waited and wondered about my life. Yesterday I had an amazing party, and met an amazing woman that I hoped to meet again soon. I looked around my hospital room, hoping someone had thought to left my cellphone handy. It was nowhere in sight. The stiffness in my body hinted that I’d been here more than one night. I felt aches all over my body and pressure on my chest. Everything felt uncomfortable.

My mind drifted in and out of sleep. Alternating between boredom and confusion. I have no idea how much time passed, but after a while the ex-bitch walked into the room. But she looked different from what I remembered. She wore a smile on her face. A smile! Despite the fuzziness around my mind I felt confident that I’d never seen a smile on her face in our seven year marriage.

“I’m SO HAPPY you’re finally awake!” She rushed over to me and kissed my face all over, several times. “I love you, honey. I felt so lost without you.” She pulled a chair over and sat next to the bed, holding my hand.

“You’ve been in a coma for a bit over a year. Do you remember what happened?” She asked. I was glad for an explanation, but a year? My mind staggered. I tried shaking my head. It did not move far, but she understood the gesture.

“Complications during a routine surgery….” she said with sadness in her eyes.

When did she get emotions?”  I wondered to myself. Before she could say more, the doctor walked in.

“I’m glad you’re awake! It’s been a long year for all of us. I’m Doctor Robertson. The Doctor that performed your surgery is no longer with us, and I took over your case. How are you feeling, now that you’re awake?” He asked me. I nodded to avoid speaking.

“Good. I know speaking hurts, but that’ll pass. Other than the coma you’ve been stable for several months already. We’ll keep you a few days for observation and to make sure you heal up okay. Today’s Tuesday, I’m confident you’ll be home by Friday. Then you and your wife can go start your new life as a lesbian couple.”

Lesbian?” I looked down at my chest, despite the pain in my neck. The pressure I felt earlier was a pair of breasts. I looked over to my wife with panic in my eyes. She smiled at me and leaned forward give me a kiss on the cheek.

“You’re so brave for transitioning, honey. I love you so much,” She said loudly. The doctor smiled and left the room. Even though we were now alone, she leaned forward and whispered in my ear.

“Don’t even cheat on me again.”


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